I never thought I’d find a spiritual guru, well I never thought I needed one man. But several years ago I found myself in a life crisis. I was stuck between a breakup and a geographical WTH moment! I’ve written about that before so I won’t go into details of that but you can find the posts here –> Hello God? Part one and here–> Hello God?? Part two
Deepak Chopra has a book called the Seven Spiritual Laws of Success. One of the laws is the Law of Detachment. It states: “…that in order to acquire anything in the physical universe, you have to relinquish your attachment to it. This doesn’t mean you give up the intention, and you don’t give up the desire. You give up your attachment to the result.”
I’m telling you guys that this law is the bomb diggity of all the laws! It is the most liberating feeling to be able to put this law into effect!
Deepak Chopra also goes on to say that “attachment is based on fear and insecurity and the need for security is based on not knowing the true Self.”
Um..word to your momma on that one! I was unknowingly adrift in a ocean trying to find myself. But the crazy part was that I thought I knew myself inside and out. Looking back I realize that who I thought I knew was really the perception of what everyone else thought of me and expected me to be.
That’s some crazy shiznit! I learned to detach myself spiritually from everyone else’s thoughts, feelings, expectations, desires and most of all emotions that I LET negatively affect me. I learned that the outcome was not what I should be concerned with. My intentions could remain true while letting go.
I say to people that ya gotta let it go and let it flow. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not perfect when it comes to practicing this all the time but I have to say that I am not the same emotionally reactive person I was five or six years ago. All we have is this moment and then it’s gone, not to resurface again. What happens if you dwell on something that you have no control over?
But first let’s ask ourselves what we actually do have control over. I have control over how I choose to respond and what I choose to let take hold of me.
So maybe someone says to me, “Hey Lori! Uh.. looks like you enjoyed a few too many holiday cookies.” I could respond with snarky disdain or I could be be like, “But darn they were tasty!” Or maybe I could (and should) just let it go and say nothing at all because their words are looking for a response and their words speak of the hurt they are feeling somewhere and they decided to direct it towards me. I know my true self and choose to let the remark go and let it flow AND my intention for this person could be positive and I don’t have to let go of said positive intention but I do need to let go of what I think they’ll say the next time we meet.
In practicing the Law of Detachment I have found more and more security and comfort. Being secure in the unknown gives me a sense of peace. I don’t have to wonder, analyze, worry or try to figure out the unknown because I am completely comfortable in not knowing.
The Law of Detachment also helps me mind my own business. One can wax poetic philosophies all day but in the end I don’t feel the need to impose my beliefs on anyone. Not to say that listening and learning is bad but I won’t thump my views until I get a follower/believer.
I used to like to be involved in people’s problems. I’d be like, “I can help! I’m a nurturer, fixer and a warm loving blanket to wrap around you. Ask me to help you! Let me be the one to listen! Let me be the one you go to!!!!” Ugh… that was freakin exhausting! I LET people suck my energy because I wanted to be the emotional martyr! Why? Because I was insecure and wanted to be needed.
I no longer trespass on people. (Although sometimes if I’ve had a little too much to drink the old me comes out and I despise my poor decisions in the morning.). I say that my give a s@#% factor is zero and I don’t say that to be mean, not at all. But, unless someone seeks me out then my give s@#% is zero because it’s based on not knowing and quite frankly the less I’m know sometimes the better off I am. Also I say it because other people’s opinions of me are none of my business and I don’t give a s@#%. I know my truth. I know I am a good person and I live a mostly good life.
The Law of Detachment also helps me detach from my ego. And my ego needs regular detaching. Lol…
“Give what you have. To someone, it may be better than you dare to think.”
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow