What a week it has been! I put in way too many hours at work this past week. I basically woke up, went to work, came home, slept and then repeated it all again for 7 days. Which totally explains my state of pure exhaustion today. For the most part work was really good, I love my co-workers and my work keeps me consistently busy but it was an emotional work week. I work in healthcare and I am normally very good at detaching once I leave for the day but this week was a little different for some reason. I came home a couple of nights last week and cried and cried. It is so hard to know and accept that no matter what you do and how hard you try that you can’t help/save everyone. Sometimes you feel as though you don’t even make a small dent in the situation. Sometimes I lose my emotional balance…
Here is where the honest part of this blog comes in…. like I said it will not always be sunshine and butterflies. I struggle with where I am at right now in my healthcare career. What direction I want to take it in. I feel that if I am not able to impact everyone, then maybe it is not the role I am supposed to be in. The “all or nothing” trap! I know I want to take a different path then the one I am currently on. I am very good in the role I am in and there is an endless road for advancement. However, I have been in this role for so long now that I am pretty sure I want to see the other side. The prevention not invention side of things. I was having a conversation with someone the other day and they said to me, “Why can’t they just invent something for it?” I responded, “It’s not about invention, it’s about prevention.” That is when I had kind of an “Aha” moment. I am always preaching to my family these words of wisdom.
My amazing older sister said to me once, “What the hell are you doing? Start doing what you are passionate about!” But how?????? (The last time I did that I ended up in the E.R. with a CT, spinal tap and concussion! Whitewater rafting guide school anyone?! I don’t regret it for a minute!!) Deepak Chopra says we should concentrate on finding our dharma. Well I started this blog for one, and two, I am studying for my NASM test to be a personal trainer. So those are two things right?!
Roads are not often paved smoothly and they are often long, winding and have TONS of detours. I have road tripped across this country several times mostly without a destination. The best places I have EVER been are because of detours, side roads of curiosity and the occasional bossy state trooper…LOL. (I could do a whole post related to that one!..haha!) My other amazing sister, my little sister, bought me a beautiful necklace years ago that is engraved on back with a quote from Beverly Sills, “There are no shortcuts to anywhere worth going.” The front of the necklace is a compass. So appropriate for me 😉
Everyday that goes by I am become a happier and happier human. I am constantly learning and growing and I also develop more and more confidence in my abilities. This blog is my road tripping buddy 🙂
With that it is currently 73 degrees in Cleveland so I am off to the park!
“Give what you have. To someone it may be better than you dare to think.”
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Question: What is your passion? Your dharma?